"I'll give my soul if it means I can get a sniff of herion". This was what Zonunparmawitei , aged 42 to live in a hopeless world within the limits of Aizawl.
There were moments in her life when she wanted to take her own life. Things were pretty out of hand. She was deprived of parental love and care. Her parents separated, her father left them for a younger pretty face; later mom followed the same example. She then had no choice but to live with her old grandfather, who passed away 2 years later. She immediately gave into drugs before she was awaken to the real cruel world; even before how she knew how to mourn; felt that this might quench her shallow empty soul. She doesn't have a friend, she didnt know how to make one. "YMA doesn't understand!! Nobody understands me! Nodody wants me, they always go away..." Her face still shallow and empty as she narrates.
Few pauses and deep breaths she continued...
She was not more than 13 years of age. Owing to the nectar of the drugs, she entered into the harsh world of prostitution - seemed the best option to earn. Henceforth, plunged into the sex-drug dark world. Multiple sex partners had never been a problem, rather, getting pregnant. She shudders as she said the word 'pregnant'. With a soft blush she said her favourate customers were boys staying in some hostel... "They were easy to be pleased plus i get extra tips....... and oh!! I also do girls!!!!" she added without hesitation "It's like two empty people meet... both craving for company". She wouldn't care less for a condom or the law, so long as she got few bucks. No stopping where she would go to -to what extend... At age 29, as she had most dreaded, she got pregnant... to her suprise the man wanted to marry her, aged 50.
Whew... Finally !!! Twinkle in her eyes.....
She still twinkled while she continued, "I've always had myself checked for a virus (HIV) after every two months... Its free, you know, I grasp for everything thats free" She laughed as though her whole body has been lifted. "Strangers give me company even if its only for a while, and my nectar keeps me in a better world". " I chose my company only after taking a good look of their eyes"
A long pause.......
Her husband, the man who promised to give her company for all their lives gave her the dreaded disease.. She still forced herself to smile as she said it. It was three months after he had passed away. She has a beautiful daughter, aged 13 years. Fortunately, she had taken good medication while pregnancy, she hasn't passed on the virus.
Suddenly, as if dark clouds appeared on her pale fragile face, "I'm so afraid history might repeat itself". She couldn't stop crying. Her daughter hugging from the back as if to comfort her, gently rubbing her arms....
....................................................
..........................
....
There were moments in her life when she wanted to take her own life. Things were pretty out of hand. She was deprived of parental love and care. Her parents separated, her father left them for a younger pretty face; later mom followed the same example. She then had no choice but to live with her old grandfather, who passed away 2 years later. She immediately gave into drugs before she was awaken to the real cruel world; even before how she knew how to mourn; felt that this might quench her shallow empty soul. She doesn't have a friend, she didnt know how to make one. "YMA doesn't understand!! Nobody understands me! Nodody wants me, they always go away..." Her face still shallow and empty as she narrates.
Few pauses and deep breaths she continued...
She was not more than 13 years of age. Owing to the nectar of the drugs, she entered into the harsh world of prostitution - seemed the best option to earn. Henceforth, plunged into the sex-drug dark world. Multiple sex partners had never been a problem, rather, getting pregnant. She shudders as she said the word 'pregnant'. With a soft blush she said her favourate customers were boys staying in some hostel... "They were easy to be pleased plus i get extra tips....... and oh!! I also do girls!!!!" she added without hesitation "It's like two empty people meet... both craving for company". She wouldn't care less for a condom or the law, so long as she got few bucks. No stopping where she would go to -to what extend... At age 29, as she had most dreaded, she got pregnant... to her suprise the man wanted to marry her, aged 50.
Whew... Finally !!! Twinkle in her eyes.....
She still twinkled while she continued, "I've always had myself checked for a virus (HIV) after every two months... Its free, you know, I grasp for everything thats free" She laughed as though her whole body has been lifted. "Strangers give me company even if its only for a while, and my nectar keeps me in a better world". " I chose my company only after taking a good look of their eyes"
A long pause.......
Her husband, the man who promised to give her company for all their lives gave her the dreaded disease.. She still forced herself to smile as she said it. It was three months after he had passed away. She has a beautiful daughter, aged 13 years. Fortunately, she had taken good medication while pregnancy, she hasn't passed on the virus.
Suddenly, as if dark clouds appeared on her pale fragile face, "I'm so afraid history might repeat itself". She couldn't stop crying. Her daughter hugging from the back as if to comfort her, gently rubbing her arms....
....................................................
..........................
....
13 comments:
hey Ri.. Such a nice read. Is it a true story? So sad. I got goose bumps. Your'e so good in writing as much as your'e good in narrating. Remember? My eyes welled up with tears when you told me one story of yours? Keep on writing pal.. your'e so good at it, and that's the fact.
Is this a true story or just a fiction? Reading the 2nd paragraph reminds me of the song - "Nobody's Child". If this is a fiction, it seems so real as i've read alot like about Zonunparmawitei's story. It happens in our society, in our neighbours, no one seems to understand their problems (including me). Prayer can do lots of things, and the greatest we can do is to pray for them. I felt really depressed reading this....
@Mimi: Thanks.. for you undying support
@ Joseph L: its a true story, i haven't ended the story yet..
hmm.. a sad story. I'm sorry for her.. waiting for the 2nd part
It doesn't matter if this particular story may be a fiction or a true story...this is a true
story for many of our own brothers & sisters. I feel pitty for this girl and i don't blame her at all for living this life becos she truly did not have the opportunity to choose between good and bad. Sometimes, the world is so unfair because not everyone have the same
opportunity. Its important not to judge others for what they do or who they are unless we know the circumstances that lead their life to a situation like this. I feel ashamed of myself living too much for myself and not for others. You may be surprise but the story reminds me of the song "I Can't Get No - Satisfaction" written by Mick Jagger and Keith Richards. Its true that we all try and try and try but can't get no satisfaction. We will be satisfied only when we are ready to understand the unfortunate journey of a poor girl like this. The point of satisfaction will never be the same for everyone, its just a matter of how we set our mind to it.
Dear Rita, I am trying to follow the blogs following Mimi's blog and I hope you don't mind me following your blog. I hope you have not given out the real name because I believe it's a true story that you've told us. As a journalist, I know the hardships that people face because of broken families and abject poverty which really drives them to drugs and commercial sex contrary to some people's belief that KS are "mihurs". The Mizo society truly needs to understand the problems we have so that we can try and solve them in practical and down-to-earth ways.
Just condemning "sins" is not the way to solve some of our social problems and I believe the Kohhrans are approaching the problems in the wrong way. Gospel camps are good for renewing your spiritual needs but not for solving society's problems. These are really physio-psychological in nature and you need experts in these areas to counsel what we call "wayward girls", not pastors or so-called evangelists.
@mnowluck : The second part would come soon
@ Mama Zadeng: Thank You, I'm glad you feel that way, that was the intension.
@ Pu David M. Thangliana: WOW! I mean WOW!!! Of course you can follow the blog. You had my permission before you even asked. What you said about the church leaders...My sentiments exactly!! I cannot begin to describe the feeling your comment made a stand in my humble page. Thank you so much.
Again, the main intention for 'The other side of our world' is to have empathy, love and understanding; not to 'judge' not have pity....All they ever ask for is a pair of listening ears.. I believe all of you have proved to have them. Thank you, really.
Extremely well written with tremendous good flow. It is so sad, to catch the disease from the least expected place. Its definitely a dark drama.
By the way, I do second Pu DMT's concern - I hope Zonunparmawitei is not her real name. And thats quite a name too. :-)
Lastly, there is something wrong with your template. If you click the Post title of this post, it is supposed to take us to this particular post page. Instead it is taking us to your blog main page.
@ Illusionaire : Thanks, I can always count for your support.
Yes, Zonunparmawitei is a fictional name. I simply cannot give the real name.
I'll check with the link right away, thank you very much
Deeply touching! I've always wondered what would it be like to hear life-stories of old beggars on the streets, of people so much less fortunate than others, stories of pain and hardships, of shattered hopes and dreams, and how they cope with it.
I guess we need to sensitize ourselves, cos' without understanding peoples lives, we say "They had a choice... they could've chosen a different path.. etc etc" but we just can't see beyond our own understanding.
@ blackestred : Quite true.. . Its only a matter of our desire and will to change our attitude.. But hey, I know you understand them or else why would you ponder your thoughts at the beggars, right? :-D
Being in the medical profession, I have personally come across a few tragic stories like that of Zonunparmawitei's (quite a mouthful)
But again, everything depends on ur perspective...u can leaqrn a lot from these so-called social outcasts such as ks, nghawlvei and addicts in a few days of genuine interaction than you would in our oft protected cushioned "perfect" society in a lifetime....i had some heart warming, tear jerking, anger inciting and LMAO moments with them.....and one thing I leant from them is to be appreciative of people who truely care for you
And MrDavid - about the gospel camping issue...yes all these social issues cannot have a quickfix solution....we cant be too lazy to leave it in God's hand, after all He put us here to make a difference....The exact words I was looking for!
@ OPa Hmar: You can call her Moitei... :-). I wish I can share those moments... You are very lucky, I got to have only one moment. I love your concluding statement.
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